Lost & Found
You’re Not Lost
It’s not that you get lost, it’s that the you that you really are gets covered up in veils of untruth and deceit.
I knew that I craved the love I didn’t get from a time when I was small and meant to be cherished.
I’d worked on that before, I told myself when it all came crashing down…. Again.
Really, Zoey!?
Disgusted by my own self-betrayal and does it even matter that it was with a good man.
Does it even matter at all who it was with?
My good conscience seems to think so so I go along with it.
He was a good man, a kind man, a loving man.
Just a man not quite in my sphere of integrity, word, and the legacy, dreams, empire (?) that I am here to build.
None of those terms even jive with me at the moment because it’s bigger than that.
I want to take all the taboos out of the closet.
I want to cause jaws to drop because, “omg we don’t talk about that subject…”
I mean did it really serve any of us to hide behind our own veils of deceit and delusion? No.
We are meant to EXPRESS and LET GO.
REPENT and FORGIVE.
Confessions are our saving grace.
No wrong is so wrong that God won’t forgive us. But is that true I hear the people in the crowd saying. I can hear you disagree.
I get it. There are certain wrongs that can’t be made right, you think…
But did we ever stop to wonder if that’s WHY they still keep happening.
Because we cast people out and don’t give them even a second glimmer of hope.
When hurt people hurt people, those people need help too.
Don’t Let The Enemy Have A Seat At Your Table
No, that doesn’t mean that you are necessarily the ones to help them but they can seek help and not be stoned to death by your mistake… and mine.
No I don’t think it’s right but will the world really ever change for our kids and their kids and their kids if we don’t do something about it… now?
It does begin with you and honestly too many people stay hidden because of shame and self-loathing. I myself have been defeated by the enemy of doubt and fear but I always win that battle because God saved me like he always has.
And as I start to emerge from my shell I see the value in shooting down the enemy ship.
They won’t land here and they won’t win the battle.
But I tell you you can’t stay hidden if you want life to work.
You can’t build a castle in the sky on top of poop.
If you try you will sink in the mudd of gook and your castle will fall.
Your word and who you say you are and who you create yourself to be is reliant on you owning and trusting that you can do what you say you’re going to do and if you don’t then you say that too.
No one is perfect but we’re all perfectly imperfect.
I just want you and me and everyone to realize how special you are. Not like all about you special but special because you are here to impact people and make a difference.
You are here to leave your mark and you can’t do that staying hidden. You do it by walking out on a thin limb and risking being seen.
The people around you are showing you, YOU.
Owning the mistakes you made because you’re HUMAN.
If you don’t OWN IT, it will OWN YOU.
And if the thoughts, speech, limiting beliefs own you then you’re shit out of luck.
That’s the work, gorgeous ones. That’s the place you must go and do battle but don’t worry you’re not alone.
I AM has you as long as you remember – don’t let the enemy have a seat at your table.
And I really thought I was going to get away not knowing and not seeing that I was settling for less “in order to” try and get what I thought I couldn’t have nor give to myself.
Yet another layer peels back and the tears come because this onion is spicy.
Would I want to take a bite out of it, no way. But the onion must be peeled and breathed in. sit with it and allow the aroma to devour every sense and brainwave, but only for a little bit of time.
Get to know your mistakes intimately so that you know them, own them, trust yourself later on in the future and forgive yourself because you are the Source of all that is good in your life in partnership with the Divine.
Do not let the enemy have a seat at your table.
I love you
& You’re Mine
Zoey Linnea
